Here I am again. Leaving, coming back. Happy then despressed.

[censored part]

Yet I can't stop crying.

I feel so empty. Heartless. I'm... dry. I don't have anything to give to anyone. My ex-girlfriend must knew it. She was right after all.
My body disgusts me. It's like a big heap of fat, hairs and tears. When I'm watching to human bodys male or female, I'm about to vomit. Or to laugh. That's a problem when you're an art student.

Hysterical.

My life is a true mess. And to tell the truth, I shouldn't complain. I have food. A bed. Loving parents. I don't have to work yet, I'm studying art... I shouldn't complain. And I'm not. Crying hidden in the WC. Puting a smile on my face when I want to shout. Avoiding my classmates's questions.

"How are you ?
-I'll survive.
-What do you mean ?
-Just kidding !
-We didn't saw you all week... why ?
-I missed my train...
-Five times ?
-Yeah, that's stupid, isn't it ? I have to go, see you !"


I'm crawling away from myself.